I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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