hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize