i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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