we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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