Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
