I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I bet he comes in French.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
