i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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