hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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