my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
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