I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
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