I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
