Having a random hookup so left but love u
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
