no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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