I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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