we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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