you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I am naked and annoyed.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
