I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Houston, we have a squirter
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
This is classic penis vs brain.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
