So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
