Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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