Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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