Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
