i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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