Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
