Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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