Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize