I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
