I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
We just shotgunned beers for America
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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