He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
