I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize
