I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
