grandma shit on top of the toilet
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Randomize
