one two three fourrrrnication!
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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