I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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