i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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