Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
