No, drunk sperm still make babies.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
