but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
