Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize