i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
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