I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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