Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
