she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
