Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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