Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
