so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
