I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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