And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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