Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize