Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
Do you still have your period?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
