You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize
